Online Dating

Seeking a suitor at your computer,
One girl is smarter, another is cuter.
One guy is kinder, another is wiser;
One's a big spender, another's a miser.
One is a thinker, another's a looker.
One girl's so sleazy you'd think she's a hooker.

Chorus:
It’s online dating,
The newest form of mating.
The easy way to find a spouse.
Don’t even need to leave your house.
Just type a bit and click your mouse
To find the perfect match.

So many faces, so many chases.
So many people in so many places,
Yet John's too persistent and Bob's inconsistent,
Dave doesn't shave, and then Danny's too distant.
And then there's Eric who's way too generic.
Still, anyone's better than Daniel or Derek.

Chorus

So you compare them, torment and scare them
And if you don’t like them, you're not apt to spare them
You rank them and rate them and tease them and bait them,
Drag them through hell, then you don't even date them.
From Bob to Rob, or from Barbara to Alice,
So many people, you start to grow callous.

Chorus

After you score them, you start to ignore them.
If they are lucky, you already bore them.
You cautiously scan them, cold shoulder, then pan them
Send them invites to your sites till you ban them
...
...

Chorus

Some prospects hate you, some will sedate you
Some are just happy if they can debate you.
Some will affect you while some will reject you;
Misplace a comma, and some will correct you.
When they're annoying, or coy and flirtatious,
Just bite your tongue and pretend to be gracious.

Chorus

©2007-2008 Sheryl Zettner